A Behavioral Guide to Conference Season
It’s conference season in the ABA space, and if you’ve been thinking about attending one, this is your sign.
Conferences can be a fantastic way to network, learn, and expand what’s possible in your career. They can also be… really scary. Especially if this is new for you.
Both of those things can be true at the same time.
Let’s talk about how to approach conferences in a way that actually works; not just in theory, but behaviorally.
Choose Conferences Wisely
Let’s start with the obvious: conferences are expensive.
Between registration, travel, hotels, and time off work, this is an investment. And like any investment, it should be intentional.
Not all conferences will contact the contingencies you’re actually looking for.
Before you register, ask yourself:
What do I want more of right now? (skills, connections, exposure to new areas, mentorship)
Who do I want to meet?
What kind of conversations do I want to be in?
From there, choose accordingly.
If you’re early in your career or trying to get more involved, I often recommend:
Your local or state chapter conferences (lower cost, higher accessibility, easier to build repeated contact)
National spaces like APBA, WIBA, or OBM Network depending on your interests and goals
Bigger isn’t always better. The “right” conference is the one that increases your likelihood of meaningful contact with people and ideas that move you forward.
Don’t Forget to Network
Networking is the whole point.
And also, networking is scary.
That’s not a personal flaw. That’s a predictable behavioral response to uncertainty, evaluation, and new environments.
You’re walking into a space where:
You don’t know the norms yet
You don’t know the people
You don’t know what’s expected of you
Of course that feels uncomfortable.
The goal is not to eliminate that feeling. The goal is to act with it.
Make Networking Easier (and More Likely to Happen)
If you’re not sure where to start, here are a few ways to lower the barrier to entry:
1. Play the “student/early career” card
You do not need to pretend you belong—you already do.
Try:
“Hi, this is my first conference—can I ask what you do?”
It works because it’s honest, it sets clear expectations, and it invites the other person to talk, which most people are more than willing to do.
You’re not bad at networking. You just need an opening line that actually functions.
2. Start with people who feel safer
If networking feels overwhelming, narrow the scope.
One strategy I often suggest: connect with female-presenting professionals first.
Not because men are bad, but because there is a higher probability that women in this field have had the exact experience you are having right now.
They’ve been the new person.
They’ve walked into rooms where they weren’t sure how to start.
They’ve figured it out over time.
That shared history matters. It increases the likelihood of reinforcement early on, which makes you more likely to keep going.
3. Focus on contact, not performance
A lot of people approach conferences like a performance:
Say the right thing
Be impressive
Don’t mess it up
That’s a lot of pressure, and it usually backfires.
Instead, shift the goal:
Your job is to make contact, not to be impressive.
Ask questions. Stay curious. Let conversations be a little awkward.
Fluency doesn’t come from thinking about networking. It comes from doing it, repeatedly, in real environments.
Talk to the People Doing the Work
I want to share two quick stories.
At one conference I attended, I worked up the courage to walk up to a researcher I really admire. I got in front of him and said something along the lines of:
“I really love your research…”
And then… nothing.
He gave a minimal response and moved on with his day.
To be clear, this isn’t a callout. I’ve had much better interactions with this same person since then. And honestly, what was he supposed to say to that?
I didn’t give him anything to respond to.
That interaction taught me something important:
Admiration without direction doesn’t create conversation.
Now, a different experience.
I was on the social media committee for a Florida state conference and was tasked with interviewing William Heward after his keynote.
So I waited.
And while I waited, I watched him interact with every single person who approached him.
He didn’t rush.
He asked their names.
He listened to what they had to say.
He was incredibly gracious and kind.
When it was finally my turn, I told him how impactful it was to watch someone take that much care with people.
He grabbed my arm, walked me over to the conference bookstore, and signed a copy of his book for me.
Here’s the takeaway
Not all networking opportunities are created equal.
If you’re feeling starstruck, or just unsure where to start:
Talk to the PhD students and early-career professionals working under the people you admire
Pay attention to how people interact with others before you approach them
Because that tells you something important.
If someone is engaging the way Dr. Heward did (present, kind, and genuinely interested), you can be fairly confident that it’s a safe space to start a conversation.
There are two practical shifts here:
1. Give people something to respond to
Instead of:
“I love your research”
Try:
“I read your work on [specific topic], and I’m curious how that applies to [context]” or “I’m really interested in [area]. What would you recommend someone focus on early in their career?”
2. Choose environments that reinforce you back
Networking isn’t just about approaching people; it’s about contacting reinforcement.
Some people will be more available, more responsive, and more generous with their time.
Find those people.
Start there.
Build momentum.
A Quick Reframe
If you’re waiting until you feel confident to start networking, you’ll be waiting for a long time.
Confidence is not a prerequisite, it’s a byproduct.
What actually builds confidence?
Repeated exposure
Reinforcement from real interactions
Learning what works (and what doesn’t)
In other words: contact with the environment.
Final Thoughts
Conferences can absolutely change the trajectory of your career.
Not because of the sessions you attend, but because of the people you meet and the conversations you have.
Will it feel uncomfortable? Probably.
Will it be worth it? Also probably.
Go anyway.
